+ Fish Eight +

This is probably the youngest fish I've gone out with, and I wouldn't go out with anyone younger. It's the minimum limit, hah. Fish Eight was nice. We went to see The Conjuring, which was actually a pretty good movie for something I'd barely heard of. Fish Six actually had talked about The Conjuring on our date and ended up giving me the back-story and supposed true story of the movie. I thought it was a little amusing to have seen it with someone else after hearing about it.

Anyway, the movie was better than I thought and Fish Eight and I decided we'd walk around and talk for a while. The while turned into about four or possibly more hours walking around. We mostly just talked about our lives so far. Talked about jobs, a little about family, traveling we've done, traveling we possibly want to do, experiences working, experiences about places we've lived, etc.

He'd told me he's never had a girlfriend, or dated much. He kind of was putting quite a bit of pressure on himself, which I felt bad about. It kind of reminded me of Casanova because he's always doing that to himself. The amount of pressure Eight was putting on himself kind of had me pretty skittish about meeting him. I was concerned, I'm not going to lie.

He ended up being okay, though. I just don't know how to feel. I can't tell if it's just my commitment issues or if I'm still not feeling like I know this guy or what... but I just don't know what I want. Maybe it's that I don't really know what I want in general. At this point I'm kind of feeling like I just want to hang out with these guys and build some sort of friendships and hang out with zero pressure. I don't see why some of these men are in such a hurry to pin me down and lay some kind of claim on me. It tends to make me want to run away and hide.

We ended up hanging out on Tuesday again and saw Riddick. Which was surprisingly good because it's a third movie and face it... they're usually not the best movies ever. I mean, The third Mummy...need I say more? This time we couldn't really hang out much afterward because I had work the next day and I am a baby and like to try to be in bed no later than 10. Yeah, I know I'm an hour late right now because I'm trying to catch up on my blog and my dating life. You know, because people ask and it's easier to point them in the direction of this than having to keep texting all my exploits.

And I'm supposed to see this guy again tomorrow. I still don't totally know how I feel or what he wants. I mean I'm kind of worried about the fact he's never had a girlfriend because I don't want that much pressure. He hasn't even tried to kiss me which is weird when so many of the guys I've met have been so keen on jumping the gun with all things physical. I mean I had a couple trying to sister-wife me, a couple of offers of no strings sex, a few friends with benefits offers, etc. A guy that tries nothing makes me concerned... And I don't know that I want to be a first for anyone because that almost always means it's going to end in disaster. God knows I know how my first ended... my first of everything. Every small part of relationship stuff ended badly. I don't know that I want that kind of responsibility.

And yet he's a nice guy. I don't know. I just have no freaking clue what it is that I want.