+ Praying for a Drought +

I'm not sure how I feel about this semester just yet.

Too much is going on and is becoming on the verge of changing. I'm about to do something partly life-changing, not like mind-blowing life changing. But it will change how I live. If that makes sense? And it will bring another thing down to crumbling ruins before my eyes, it will be chaotic, and possibly turn horribly. I honestly don't know to be honest. It is something that I'm going to have to seriously think about how to let unfold.

It will probably be loud. It will probably be dramatic. It may or may not end badly. But I think it's for the best. The best of my mental health. The best for my stress-level. The best for all things concerned. I just don't want to jinx it just yet.

Then there is also the fact that things are weird so far in the semester. I mentioned my moods being all wonky which honestly doesn't help things. I tend to have a 'I could care less' attitude about a lot of things lately. Except where academics and my job is concerned.

My job is going well. I like working with my two coworkers. They're nice and we get along. We joke with each other and talk about things as we're working. We work well together. I think, anyway. They might have a different opinion -as I don't really know what they think of me. I can be silly. I can be brass - especially with my sarcasm. But I'm pretty sure they know I'm joking during my sarcastic brat moments.

Classes are killer this semester though. I have two education classes which together I had to read roughly 273 pages of textbook goodness and then had to do seven reflections - one for each chapter at roughly a page each worth of my own writing. It took all of Saturday to get done. That doesn't even count my four other English classes - two literature classes, one History of the English language, and one Grammar and Key Concepts. The literature classes are probably my favorite of the classes I'm in so far this semester. I just like reading classic literature and this gives me an excuse to do it. Plus reading is easy and requires little effort, just time and comprehension.

Whereas grammar takes a ton of work. There's a lot to grammar, and I had no idea how little I apparently know about grammar. I didn't realize I knew so little until my first attempt to take a college grammar class last semester when the only homework assignment she'd collected I got a 53% on and the exam 1 (after studying for a solid two weeks prior) I got a 50% on. I don't think anyone had gotten better than a 70% on the exam. That's how crazy hard grammar is. I'm not looking forward to it, but at least I have people that I know in it with me. That's of some comfort.

History of the English Language is pretty linguistic-y. Which I am not particularly fond of - my last professor for linguistics has killed the study of language for me. I hate phonetics, phonology, and that kind of thing. It is enough to drive me bonkers. I am almost convinced that I am going to be drowning this entire semester. But I shall put on a brave face and pray for a drought to end my almost drowning.