It was a night like any other, or so she thought. Little did she know it'd forever keep a remembrance of firsts for her. She met up with a girl she barely knew, only had known her a couple of weeks. Her friends were gone for the weekend, and she was going to be alone on Halloween night, what fun could that be? She accepted the invite to a frat party which would forever change things, or at least keep them written in stone for her for the rest of her life.
The evening started out normal enough, go eat dinner, and get ready with her new friend Camille, and then they walked together to the party. She was dressed the least risqué as anyone else there, including some boys. Adorned in platform boots and a long medieval dress, underneath she had on jeans and a tank top because the dress was itchy and she knew she'd never be able to handle that. She accepted some Smirnoff and let herself fall into her own awkward mind, "What am I doing here?! I feel so out of place. Why'd I say I'd come to this party? Wouldn't staying in tonight have been a much better idea?" She let herself fall into the crowd, sticking closely and awkwardly by Camille, the one person she knew there. She got talked into playing beer pong for the first time ever. She wasn't very good because she'd never done it before, and she felt ridiculous and stupid. They were up against two of the standing champions; they had won every game that night. She didn't make one ping pong ball in a cup.
A couple hours in she felt more than ready to leave, but she was a wimp and couldn't bring herself to walk out by herself. She stayed against her better judgement. She continued to watch the games of beer pong go on and be amazed at how they threw the balls with a flawless arch, making it look so easy. Drunken girls stumbling along in heels everywhere, wearing close to nothing, she couldn't help but wonder how they felt safe in that state of mind, in that little of clothing. She was wearing layers, only her forearms, hands, neck, and face exposed, and she wasn't sure she felt safe.
Camille convinced her to go with her while she played pool. A game that at least she knew and could be good at depending on how much she concentrated. Four boys already had a game going, so they stayed and talked to some others who were watching. The game ended a minute later, and one of the boys with face paint came up and was looking for a beer pong partner. He asked her, she said she was really bad, she'd only played once before. Camille added that she sucks, the boy smiled and said it'd be fine. She trusted him, and followed him back down the stairs to the basement. He continued to encourage her, even when she was off and felt embarrassed. Each time smiling and hugging her, saying she was so close, even when she wasn't. Each time he made one in he'd pull her close to him and hug her in tightly, and high five her. They won the first game, all because of him, he even drank half of her beer. The second game they lost, but she made her first ball in a cup, and she hit a lot more rim balls, and he kept saying she did well, and wrapped his arms around her. After the second game Camille came back down to see how the game went, she was more shocked than anyone that they had won the first game. Camille suggested they go back and play another game or two of pool. The other boy Camille had been hanging out with had already washed off his face paint.
The first game of pool she was on a team with the face-paintless boy. They lost, but she had some good shots. Camille looked at her and whispered, "He's either really drunk or he really likes you." It was almost a foreshadowing of sorts. The second game her and Camille lost because Camille scratched on the break. The third game she was with the face paint boy again, and they won. Even when he couldn't remember they were solids, and not in fact, stripes like his mind kept tricking him of. And they all decided they wanted to take a shot, afterwards he decided to take off his own face paint, and a moment after he left a fight broke out in the hallway. The group decided to disperse into the movie room, and Camille picked out a movie she'd never seen before. She got caught up helping a girl who was drunk by standing with her in the bathroom, and the girl was so thankful it was adorable. By the time she joined the rest of the group the movie was in, commercials running away. She took a place on a couch closest to the armchair Camille was sitting in.
The boy came back, face washed and smelling of shampoo and hair gel, he was warm and slightly sticky from being damp still, and wrapped his arm around her shoulder. He asked her if she liked scary movies, and mentioned he always laughed during them. She smiled, she did the same thing. He kept his gaze fixed on her as they talked quietly before the movie started. He kept close to her and held her hand and messed with her fingers, pulling her close, tightening his arm around her. Playing with her hand that fit nicely in his own. A little under halfway through the movie he made his move, one she wasn't expecting exactly. But she didn't mind it so much, just caught her off guard.
He turned his head so that he was looking into her eyes a moment later he had put his mouth to hers and she could feel herself yielding to him, and instead of pulling away like she thought he was going to, he went in for the kill and slipped his tongue into her own mouth. Another first for her, she'd never made out a boy before, she'd kissed boys before, but not like that. She felt silly and foolish, and couldn't push the feeling out of her mind she was doing something wrong. But he didn't pull away either, he kept on going and she started to not feel so awkward. He moved on top of her and was all but pawing at her, and he kept making loud slurping noises which she had to try hard not to laugh at and there was more saliva than she had imagined involved in making out.
She thought she'd heard someone mocking slurping noises, and she suddenly realized they definitely weren't alone, and she had completely forgotten about everyone else the moment his lips met hers. Camille said her name and added a "god you guys! Get your boy to be quiet!"
Someone else muttered, "Get a room, if you're so into it." and she felt herself blush, but he didn't pull away because she didn't pull away.
A moment later she stopped and gently pulled away, pushing lightly on his chest, and he immediately stopped kissing her, but he stayed close and kept his arms around her.
She whispered, "We're annoying them."
And he looked at her then moved, his mouth to her neck and whispered, "It doesn't matter, don't worry about them. They can deal with it."
But she wouldn't kiss him back anymore and the boy was annoyed at the girl who'd made the slurping noises and told them to get a room, "God, I have to deal with you every day, and you can't even give me one night." He glared at the girl, but let it go, and turned back to her, he asked if she wanted to go somewhere.
She felt nervous and frightened all of a sudden, he scared her, but not him exactly, but what she might be willing to do in the moment. That she'd regret later. She looked at him and muttered, "I'm not sure."
"I don't like that answer, give me a real answer." The boy looked at her hoping she'd yield to him again. She felt her heart flutter as he looked into her eyes, and she said, "It's complicated." She was too afraid to say that she hadn't even made out with anyone before him, before that night.
He was quiet for a moment, "Well, will you give me a real answer by the end of the movie?" Her eyes were still locked to his and she nodded. He whispered, "I want to tell you something, but I don't know if I should."
He had her full attention, "Hm?"
"I don't know if I should tell you my secret. But it's the truth, you can ask my friend." He said, but she asked what anyway and he responded, "I'm a still a virgin, it sucks, and I hate it."
She didn't know what to say, she wasn't sure if he was just saying that. But she trusted him anyway. All she could manage was an, "Oh." And he backed off completely and pulled her arm around him and leaned against her, and slipped his hand into her own and laced their fingers together, moving his fingers now and then and she responded back. She liked him in her arms, even if she would never admit it aloud.
He kept his hands by her arms and hands and kept caressing her arms and hands, and made an occasional comment, and he moved so that his head was resting in her lap and grabbed her left hand. Her right hand entangled in his hair and she messed with his hair. Everytime he'd start making comments Camille would tell her to shut him up and she'd put her left hand over his mouth and coo, "Shhhh, you're annoying people again." And he'd just move his hand up to hers that was over his mouth and kiss her palm lightly then take her hand and entwine their fingers together again. He soon discovered she wouldn't stop him from kissing her, and so he'd occasionally slip his hand behind her head and pull her face to his own and she would yield to him once more. Letting herself be pulled in by him and wanting nothing more than that moment to never end when their lips met and she felt like someone truly cared for her again. His lips always remained light against hers, but with an urgency she could never place, his tongue moving and she would feel butterflies.
The movie ended and he asked if she wanted to stay with him, she told him she wasn't ready. He nodded and said no pressure, but that she could still stay with him with no expectations. She whispered she didn't think that was a good idea. He had his lips to hers in a moment and she melted to him so easily it scared her. He remained to be a gentleman the entire time, and he offered to walk her home instead, she said okay and he pressed his lips to hers again, and held it. He broke away and told her he was going to get shoes and a jacket and that'd he take her afterward. He came back in the room and said he was going to take her back, but Camille wanted to stay with face paint boy number two.
So, they made their way out of the house, his hand held hers comfortingly and strongly. She felt safe with him, and she couldn't place why, but it made her happy. They walked together talking all the while about nothing in particular or important, and when they got close he got confused and he didn't know where he was going. He was pulling her in the wrong direction, and she laughed saying he was going the wrong way or at least the long way around. And he smiled and admitted he didn't know where he was going, and she pulled him the right way, but then he stopped and started kissing her again in the middle of the sidewalk, and she liked being in his arms he was warm and comforting. He said they could go the long way he wouldn't mind being with her longer, and she said it was true, and he told her to pick. So, she led him the longer way and they talked more. When they reached her door, it was already opening and it was a boy from her hall she didn't much like going out to smoke. She stared at him and said, "You, what are you doing here?" And he looked at her and said, "Opening the door for you."
It creeped her out but she had a boy she liked with her so she didn't mind so much and she walked inside her hand still entwined with face paint boy. They walked into the stairwell, and went to say goodnight to each other, he looked at her, "What are you doing tomorrow?"
She said she didn't know and he asked her to go tailgating with him and that it was a lot of fun. And she agreed he said about twelve or twelve-thirty and that he'd call her. If she didn't come he'd hunt her down and he'd call to wake her up if he had to. She smiled and said she'd go with him.
He pulled her into his arms and she was pressed against him his back to the wall and they kissed again, and she didn't want it to end. He pulled away and said goodnight smiling at her, but instead of leaving they found themselves kissing again and she didn't want him to leave, and he didn't want to leave, but neither of them would say anything they just said goodnight and as he was leaving she said to him, "Don't let that guy bother you."
He smiled, "I won't. Want me to clock him in the face?"
She gave a sly smile, "do it."
And she was fairly certain he wouldn't actually do anything. She went to her room and went to go to bed. She could still smell him all over her, and she could still taste him. She went to sleep thinking of him, dreamt of him, and woke up with him on her mind. She sighed softly and called her friend so she could talk to someone about last night, and then got ready to see him… but he never called and so she didn't bother going since she hadn't heard from him. She was left alone with thoughts of him on her mind, a bite mark on her neck, and a nickel he found under the couch cushion and told her to keep. Maybe all boys are the same after all.
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